CIO = screaming every bedtime even once trained. What’s my alternative?

My son is 14 months old. We sleep trained twice already with CIO and never got to the part where the baby is supposed to peacefully go to sleep. He would sleep through the night but still SCREAM at bedtime for 2-10 minutes. Each time the sleep training unraveled after a few months, ruined by teething or illness which led us to bringing him into our bed to sleep since he would not fall asleep (and stay asleep) any other way.

Current situation: wakes up around 7, naps at noon, rocked to sleep, for 1.5-2.5 hours, bedtime between 7 and 8 depending on how nap went and how cranky he is. We rock him to sleep and have more recently got him used to being placed in the crib awake and being patted to sleep. He wakes up as early as 11pm, as late as 4am, screaming his head off. If we go in and rock him to sleep or hold his hand etc in the crib he falls asleep after 30-45 mins depending on the day, but reliably is awake and screaming again an hour or two later. At this point he ends up in our bed because my husband and I can’t handle multiple 30+ minutes “back to sleep” sessions in one night.

I don’t mind co sleeping occasionally but don’t want to sleep with him years and years, which feels like the direction we’re going in because he’s so used to it now.

I am not against CIO, we’ve done it before and I personally don’t think a few nights of crying is harmful in any way, especially if it leads to better sleep. HOWEVER I don’t think crying every single night, even once trained, at the intensity my son cries, is OK. And that’s what happens with him with CIO: screams until he falls asleep every night for months and months. I have heard of “power down” babies which are like this but personally I just can’t get behind it, I want to find another way to improve his sleep that doesn’t result in him wailing every single night.

I want to try sleep lady shuffle/chair or similar methods but have heard they’re ineffective and am worried about wasting weeks and weeks on a gentle method that won’t work.

Any advice welcome! 🙏🏼