The Solution to My Hemorrhoids (six months in)
Caveat: I'm not a doctor and this isn't medical advice. This is just me relaying what I've done to solve my internal hemorrhoids issues. Skip to the bottom for a list of preventive measures and pain treatments that worked/didn't work for me. Please feel free to add what worked and what did not work for you, and let me know if you have questions on any bit of it, I won't hesitate to answer.
Hemorrhoids, the internal kind, might peek out but probably don't. Have had them pretty much all my life, starting with when I lost a bunch of weight when I was about 20. 13 years later, they're still happening despite trying to treat them by taking fiber supplements, drinking tons of water, squatting more on the john, using steroid creams prescribed by doctors, Tucks wipes for the pain, and while most of these things are good anyway, none of it just works.
My research had brought up the fact that countries outside the West rarely have hemorrhoids/piles, so I concluded that it still must be a lifestyle issue and that I wouldn't get any surgery option available. This is where I got the squat-more idea which has certainly helped the process generally but not solved the issue. What did solve it, at least for the past several months? It's kind of a stupid story, one that I wasn't paying enough attention to.
See, I had been doing weightlifting for the past six or so years, and I noticed that during my bulk periods I had absolutely zero problems despite not eating any vegetables or other fiber-rich foods. For context, my cut/lose weight diet was basically keto/"as little carbs as possible but lots of veggies," and that's when the problem was at its worst.
The thought "maybe I'm not eating enough food mass" had crossed my mind several times over the years and I had ignored it. I somehow finally came to my senses and started listening to that idea, and as of a few months ago I started eating more grains and starches instead of fewer and the problem is gone. Gone! Stupid, right? My body had been telling me this entire time but I wasn't listening, instead looking to doctors or armchair doctors for the answers. I fully admit that this is stuff that worked/didn't work for my body, and that others will likely have different experiences, but here's a list of preventive/pain treatment measures I tried in the past 15 or so years and how I believe my body reacted to them:
Pain
- Tucks wipes - generally worked as an immediate remedy to the fire and itching pain. Also generally didn't last long, and didn't work more than once or twice a day.
- Epsom salt baths - a wonderful pain remedy. Generally worked so well that I could sleep again if I was up because of pain, or got me going again during the day when I felt I needed to stay lying down.
Actively detrimental (I think)
- As few carbs as possible - bad, bad, bad for my body. Maybe there's a way I could get on keto again without making the bathroom a soul-searching experience but at this point I don't think so.
- Fiber, supplement - I'm pretty sure this caused an awful bout of constipation I would much rather not visit again, although I'll admit that was probably because I was taking too many for the amount of food I was eating. Regardless, I don't think these are necessary, at least for myself.
Did not work (I think)
- Fiber, supplement - I'm adding this again to clarify that I kept using them, more moderately this time, but the problem persisted. It usually went like this: take fiber pills > easy round in bathroom > keep taking fiber pills > problems started again > forget about fiber pills > repeat. I mean, maybe I mixed up steps 4 and 5 but I don't believe so.
- Steroid creams (prescribed) - I'm not convinced these did anything at all, but it was mixed in with other stuff so I'm not sure.
Maybe worked, a little
- Water - water is delicious and I don't want kidney stones again, so this is just plain important to do any way. Regardless, didn't solve the problem on its own.
- Fiber, food - this helped, I think mostly because it was extra food mass. Although, without enough carbs this didn't solve anything. As for a right now, when I'm not having the issues at all context, I'm not eating vegetables, pretty much at all.
- Exercise - I think heavy lifting simultaneously makes the problem better and worse. Bad form definitely makes it worse! One example is I started rucking recently and for some reason thought I should walk on the ball of my foot, probably because near that time I had learned that humans run better on the ball. Anyway, after an hour or so session of rucking on the ball of my foot I had the worst instance of external hemorrhoids in my life.
Worked quite well, pretty much solving my issues
- Squatting over the toilet - this helps stuff get out much more easily, so I will never stop doing it at home. It's a shame squat toilets are considered ridiculous in the US because if it didn't immediately lower the value of my home I would install one.
- "Enough" carbs/starches - mostly in the form of bread (white/wheat, I don't fixate on which anymore) and potatoes, this is what was the final puzzle piece for me. "Enough" is in quotes because right now it's me eating whatever I want, sometimes 4 PBJs/day and a half-pound of BBQ pork and that's it and sometimes it's a couple potatoes and other generally healthy items.
Haven't tried, no interest in (unless something changes, of course)
- Surgeries - put plainly, I believe that if other human populations don't have this issue much then they're doing it right and my lifestyle needs manual adjustments, not my rectum. I hope it's apparent this is a personal choice, not a judgment on others' decisions to have surgery, so to make that clear, all power to anyone who decides to have a procedure done for it, I hope it solves it for you.
To summarize my list, I think water, squatting over the toilet, and eating "enough" starchy foods fixed my internal hemorrhoids. Please let me know via reply (or DM if you need) if you have any questions at all, I could be forgetting something and I'd be happy to clarify anything.