Like many seems no way out but death

I had it all and lost it all, only myself too blame, see no hope, lost family, home and health with severe depression. I had nice gf, I Wrecked that, had nice homes lost that, now 67, not long for this world, severe depression takes 7 to 25 years off life expectancy. I was only 17 not so long ago, can't save a fool and idiot from himself, that's me, I couldn't have made worse mistakes if I tried suicide seems preferable to this miserable life