Why does it still hurt?

I recently about 2 and a half weeks ago got ghosted by a guy I had been talking to for a couple of months. Our first date had its ups and low downs, and we ended up not speaking for around a month before coming back together, working things out and talking again. From our initial rework, I genuinely thought we were on the same page about things. He claimed he liked me a lot I liked him, we were chatting consistently, sending voice notes, ect. We had plans to go on another date in the new year after our schedules were finally dying down. However, he started to kinda get sloppy with his communication with me over the month of December. We’d talk consistently, then he’d not respond to me for 2-3 days then reply and I will say it bothered me. The lady communication we had was after he had not spoken to me for two days, he texted me happy new year, disregarding the prior voicenote I’d sent him explaining how I had been sick and asking him some other questions. I replied back, happy new years then he asked what I was doing atm, I said just chilling this evening and he never replied to me after that.

I think I’m not only hurt because of the ghosting, but because I genuinely did like him, thought we were on the same page, and the fact that I wish if he was gonna do such a shitty move that he would’ve just left me in 2024 not done that literally on new years. I now question if he planned to do some shit like that from the jump. Also the way he continued to just live his best life on social media was crazy. I unfollowed him, and he still follows me watching my stories here and there. I just don’t get why it hurts when he was shitty and I hope yo get over it soon. I feel like it’s affecting my current dating life in a negative way.

Sometimes I wish he’d just text me out of the blue to at least prove he’s thought of me and hadn’t been solely an asshole, but even if that were to happen I wouldn’t wanna be with him, I wouldn’t wanna give him the time of day ever again, but I would (idk if that makes sense to anyone lmao).

Anyways, how do you meet people that are genuine outside of dating apps? I want a real connection that is not fucked up in 2025 for the first time in my life. I’m tired of getting these emotionally unavailable men.