I think being molested by my brother growing up fucked me completely up

sometimes i wonder if i just told my mom it would’ve stopped sooner but i could never break her heart like that. i’m sure i wouldn’t be so fucking hyper sexual, i wouldn’t give my body away even when i don’t want to because now i believe that’s all any man wants. i know i need to go to therapy for this and many other crazy ass things in my life but why is it so fucking expensive for people to diagnose us.